I was talking with a largely successful business entrepreneur today. We were discussing success and the reasons why some people are very successful and others not. He surprised me in what he said. He said it's "fear of ......" and you fill in the blank.
Fear of losing your house, being poor, someone coming in and taking some of your market share, not being #1... It's different for everyone, but he holds the belief that is why he is successful.
In his case, he was afraid of losing his house and living in an apartment for the rest of his life. So he worked his tail off, built his empire in a thriving metropolis and did not lose one account for 14 years. Later he sold the business, moved and is now involved in other entrepreneurial ventures.
He got me thinking though. I looked inward and asked myself what my driving force to succeed is--is it failure?
No, I am not afraid. Fear is not my driving force and I would argue it is not a healthy, long-term driver. Do I have fears and at times fear failure? Yes, but that is not my motivator to work hard, grow, mature, develop and become all that I can be.
This conversation got me thinking:
Do you work hard out of fear of ____ OR out of a desire to succeed?
Do you play not to lose OR do you play to WIN?
There is a difference. I saw it in last year's Thanksgiving football game between the University of Texas and Texas A&M. The game was a close one, "made for Hollywood" style. The tide turned several times and during the drama a UT friend of mine commented:
They are playing not to loose instead of playing to win.
I thought that was profound. There is a difference between the two. One is playing out of fear of failing, not meeting expectations, "don't let the other team beat us" mentality... The latter though is playing to put all their hard work together, to put together a great performance, to perform up to their potential, to succeed.
When you play to win, you use the competition to spur you on--to bring out the best in you, not so that you don't loose, but so that you become all that you are capable of becoming! The competition helps you unleash your full potential.
When you play not to loose, you are hesitant and cautious; timid and scared. You try and ignore the elephant in the room that wears a sign around his neck saying: "fear of ____." Your focus is more on the competition and what they are doing rather than focusing on you and what you need to do to perform at your best.
Do you see the differences between the two?
Fear of losing VS. Playing to WIN
One is negative energy, the other positive.
One focuses on what you don't want to happen (losing), the other focuses on what you DO want to happen.
One is competition focused, the other is self focused.
One will fuel you for awhile, the other will fuel you for a lifetime!
So think on that--what drives you to succeed?
What gets you up out of bed each day?
What propels you to dream big and climb big mountains?
Is it a fear of something?
OR is it a desire to unleash your full potential?
To make the most of what you've been given?
To perform at your best to the best of your capabilities?
The subject matter here covers a wide range of topics from traveling to culture to nutrition to spiritual to athletic.